The Bet
by akatsuki-chan
Summary: When Sirius claims he could shag anyone in Hogwarts, James bets him 20 galleons he can't get Remus Lupin, their quiet antisocial roommate, into bed. Slash fic.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: I'm sticking as close to canon as possible, but I did have to make this slightly AU, in that, while the Marauder's all live together, Remus isn't in the group.

Disclaimer: I wish I'd been great enough to create Harry Potter, unfortunately it belongs to J.K and not me.

* * *

"She was a looker, but no brains at all," Sirius told James from his sprawled position on the couch in the Gryffindor common room. 

"No morals either if she shagged you on the first date," James commented from the armchair across from him.

Sirius grinned. It was the morning after his date with the blonde haired Ravenclaw, whose name he'd forgotten, and, as he had told James, it had gone _extremely_ well.

"Come on, James," Sirius said, his silky raven hair glistening in the newly risen sun that shone through the windows. "I could get anyone in this school to shag me."

Peter snorted, reminding them he was there. Of course, the chubby boy was always there - tagging along behind them. He was just easily forgettable.

Glaring at him, Sirius sat up. "You guys know it's true."

Both James and Peter had to admit, Sirius had a point. He had had his way with plenty of the girls in the castle. He was intelligent, popular, and his charm was a force to be reckoned with among the students as well as the faculty. James, however, was not one to deliberately boost Sirius' ego, knowing full well that his friend's head was big enough as it was.

"Care to put money on that?" James asked, raising his eyebrows and pushing his glasses up his nose with a highly superior expression.

Sirius grinned. "Surely you don't mean betting, Mr. Potter?"

Peter looked excitedly between them, popping a chocolate frog in his mouth. Whenever the two best friends had a bet on Peter usually was placed in the middle, and as much as he pretended to be frustrated by the whole situation, he rather enjoyed the attention.

"Name the terms," Sirius said, his blue eyes positively glittering at the challenge.

"We pick the person and you have a month to get a shag," James said. "Twenty galleons if you do."

"A month?" Sirius said with a snort. "No problem."

James smirked. "Don't think we're going to pick someone easy."

"You're on," Sirius said. "So, who's the lucky girl?"

"Let's see," James said, thinking. "We need someone who will make your task difficult."

"What about Bertha Jorkins?" Peter piped up.

"That nosy seventh year Hufflepuff?" Sirius said, nose crinkling.

"No," James said. "The bigger ones are always more eager."

"Hey!" Peter said, chewing on the leg of another chocolate frog. "I resent that." Although it sounded more like "I rethent thap."

James ignored him, running his hand through his unruly black hair. "Someone cold and aloof," he thought out loud.

"How about Evans?" Peter said. "She's about as cold and aloof as you're going to get."

Sirius laughed. "No, Pete, she's only like that to Jamie here." The cold glare sent his way made him laugh even harder. "Besides, I don't think James would be very happy if I shagged his one true love," he said, still grinning.

James continued his search, doing his best to ignore Sirius. "What about that bitchy Slytherin Bellatrix? Or her rotten sister Narcissa?"

"James," Sirius said, disgusted. "They're my_cousins_."

"Oh, right," James said. "I forgot all you purebloods are related someway or another. Okay, that leaves Slytherins out – they have enough inbreeding going on as it is." There was a pause. "Unless – what about Snivellous?" he said with a malicious grin.

Peter broke into peals of laughter as Sirius' expression became horrified. "Merlin, James."

"You think Snape is a poof?" Peter asked, still snickering.

"Snivellous isn't a poof," Sirius stated matter-of-factly. Peter and James shot him funny looks as he seemed to be defending the greasy haired boy. Then Sirius continued. "He's asexual."

They all laughed. "Okay, okay," James said. "No, Snape."

The door to the common room suddenly opened and a tired looking boy entered. He paused when he noticed them, then nodded in acknowledgement before trudging up to the dorms.

Looking at his watch, Sirius said, "Where was he at this hour on a Sunday?" Dawn had only been an hour or so ago, and the boys were only awake because they'd stayed up all night.

"Who knows?" Peter said, catching another chocolate frog before it could hop off and shoving it in his mouth. "Lupin's weird."

"Anti-social and weird," Siruis said, before shrugging and turning back to his companions. He raised his eyebrows at James, who was absolutely beaming. "What's that look for?"

"Gentlemen," James said. "I believe we've found Sirius' new love interest."

"What?" Peter said. "Who?"

Sirius just looked at him in confusion.

"Remus Lupin. Prefect, introvert, and all around nutter."

Peter grinned and Sirius rolled his eyes. "Loony Lupin?" Sirius said. "Come on, James, he hardly speaks to us. We've lived in the same dorm for five years and we've only spoken to him like twice."

"Exactly!" James exclaimed. "He's not one of the many Sirius hero worshippers. He'll provide a nice challenge."

"Only one problem," Sirius said. "I'm not gay."

"It's called experimenting, Sirius," James said, his lips still spread in a large smile. "Everybody does it."

"Did you stop to consider that he probably doesn't swing that way?" Sirius protested a little desperately, realizing that James didn't seem to be joking.

"Well, then I guess you'll have your work cut out for you, huh?" James was glowing. "Besides, you did say, you could get_anyone_ in the school to shag you."

Sirius sighed, cursing his lack of specificity. He shook his head. He wasn't one to back down from a bet, no matter how difficult or unappealing. It was going to be a long month.

* * *

Remus could practically feel the deep stare that was burning into his skull and only will power and patience that a boy his age shouldn't possess kept him from turning around to glare at the boy that he was certain was looking at him. His shoulders hunched slightly as he busied himself with the transfiguration reading McGonagall had assigned them for the rest of the period, silently praying class would soon be over so he could get away from the eyes that had been watching him for the past few days. 

Remus knew very little about Sirius Black, despite the fact that they were roommates. He deliberately kept to himself, out of fear that if anyone got too close they would find out what he was, and neither Sirius or his friends James and Peter seemed to like him all that much anyway.

What Remus did know about Sirius Black was that suddenly and inexplicably having the boy's attention focused almost entirely on him was probably a good cause for paranoia. He was smart and he was a troublemaker and there were only two reasons Remus could come up with for him to catch the interest of such a person. He was either going to be the next target of one of his James and Peter's pranks or he had figured out his secret.

Neither was a pleasant idea, but at least the idea of being a prank target didn't make him feel very much like throwing up every time he thought about it – so he found himself wishing they would just hurry up and get the prank out of the way so he could go back to his normal quiet life where they just ignored each other. He tried to place the other thought out of his mind.

He breathed a silent sigh of relief when McGonagall dismissed the class and he quickly packed up his things and made his way out of the classroom. He was halfway down the hall when a voice called, "Hey, Lu—Remus!"

He stopped walking, wondering if the time for the prank had finally come, then turned slowly. Sirius was making his way through crowds of students, for once no James Potter or Peter Pettigrew anywhere near him. That made Remus even more suspicious.

He said nothing, waiting warily to see what Sirius was going to do. Sweeping his dark hair from his eyes, Sirius sent him a grin. Remus tensed, but the only thing that happened was Sirius saying, "I was wondering if you could help me."

"Help you?" Remus asked.

Sirius continued on, apparently not noticing Remus' discomfort. "I've been having a bit of trouble with DADA. Professor Franklin said I should get a tutor. I know you're pretty good with the subject. So how about it?"

How about it? He'd been expecting a head full of slime, not a tutoring proposition. Plus, he had been under the impression that Sirius was just as good with DADA as he was with all his other subjects. This sounded entirely too much like a set up.

He kept the suspicion out of his tone as he responded, "I'm really not all that good. In fact your friend James is probably—"

Sirius waved a hand. "James'll just distract me," he interrupted. "We'll end up planning pranks instead of studying."

Remus attempted to look disapproving at the mention of pranks – he was a prefect after all – but couldn't quite keep a tiny smile from his face. Having them pulled on him was less than appealing, but Remus had a mischievous side that few rarely saw and he appreciated a good prank as much anyone else.

"Surely there must be someone else you could ask," Remus said, unsure of how to get out of this.

"I'd rather it be someone I know," Sirius said.

Remus resisted the urge to point out that, even though they had lived together for nearly five years, they didn't actually know anything about each other.

"Well," Remus said hesitantly, still certain that this was a set up, but seeing no legitimate way out of it. As a prefect he was obligated to help students. "I guess I could."

Sirius' lips spread into a grin and Remus tried unsuccessfully to convince himself he was imagining the victorious gleam in his blue eyes. "Great!" he said. "Want to meet in the library tonight before dinner?"

"All right," Remus said, already certain he would be regretting this before the night was over.

* * *

Sirius made his way to Charms, where James and Peter were no doubt waiting to hear what had happened. He had left them snickering madly in Transfiguration as he had gone after Lupin. 

Until he had to actively start noticing him, Sirius had never realized how much he actually saw of Lupin during the day. The quiet boy was in half of his classes and they did live in the same room.

Lupin was small and thin. Unlike James, whose lanky form towered over most boys their age, Lupin was much smaller than all of them, except for maybe Peter, whose short and plump figure often made Sirius wonder how his tiny little legs were able to move.

What made this bet awful was the fact that Lupin was a prefect, and was nothing like James and himself. He wasn't anyone that Sirius wanted hanging around. Unfortunately, he did not seem like the type of person to have a casual fling or a one night stand, therefore Sirius had to actually get close to him, and make him trust him if he was ever going to get him into bed.

Sirius, who prided himself on being loud and obnoxious as often as possible, was amazed at Lupin's quietness. It seemed that he only spoke when spoken to, and the only class that Sirius ever heard him speak up out of his own volition was DADA – which had led him to his rather brilliant tutoring idea.

"So?" James said, as Sirius entered the Charms room and sat down next to him.

"We've got a date for tonight," Sirius said, pushing his hair out of his eyes and sending a grin at his friend.

"What?" James spluttered, looking horrified. Was Lupin that easy?

Sirius laughed at look on his friend's face. "You can relax for now, it's just a study date."

"A study date?" Peter said, peering around from the other side of James. "Studying for what?"

"DADA," Sirius said simply, lowering his voice as Flitwick stood on a stool and began class.

"You don't need help with DADA," James hissed.

"I know that," Sirius said. "And you know that. But he doesn't know that. It's the easiest way to get close to him. I've got to get him to trust me first. You should have seen him in the hallway. He looked like he was expecting me to shove a dung bomb down his pants."

"Any other day that's probably the only reason you would be talking to him," James pointed out.

"True."

James then made another face as if something particularly nasty had occurred to him. "Does this mean you're going to start having him hang out with us?"

"Well, I can't very well convince him we're friends if I ignore him all day except for when he tutors me, now can I?" Sirius said.

James groaned.

"Don't you start complaining," Sirius snapped. "You picked him. Deal with it. At least you don't have to shag him."

"Mr. Black, would you care to demonstrate the charm I was just explaining?" Flitwick said, sounding a bit irritated.

"I would professor, but I'm afraid I wasn't listening," Sirius said, managing to look innocent and mischievous at the same time. Several of the students broke into snickers, James included.

"Five points from Gryffindor. Miss Evan's, perhaps you would be so kind?"

James' attention was suddenly focused as the red haired girl Flitwick had called on shot a contemptuous glare in their direction before performing the charm perfectly.

"She's amazing," James sighed as Flitwick awarded Gryffindor ten points.

Sirius and Peter exchanged exasperated looks, well used to their friend abruptly becoming too love struck to function.

* * *

When Sirius entered the library later that day Lupin was already there, reading a thick book that he was fairly certain was not required texts. He sauntered over to the table the other boy was at and flopped into a seat next to him. 

Lupin looked up from his book and smiled tentatively at him. "Shall we get to it?" he asked, tucking the large book into his bag and pulling his Defense Against the Dark Arts book from it.

"Sure," Sirius said, refraining from rolling his eyes. Being privately tutored in a subject he already knew would be less than fun, but if he didn't want to lose his money (or his pride) he knew it would be necessary.

"So, what is the difference between a Hinkypunk and a Grindylow?" Sirius asked, later in the evening. He was quite good at playing inept, and Lupin, he realized, was very very patient. He tuned out Lupin's explanation, knowing perfectly well what the differences where, and when Lupin was done he decided that this was absolutely too boring to allow to continue. "So what do you do for fun?" he asked, leaning back against his chair and stretching.

Lupin looked up at Sirius in surprise. "Um…" he said, apparently trying to decide if Sirius was actually interested or if he was just making small talk. "I read."

"That's it?" Sirius asked, leaning towards him. "That's all you do?"

The quiet boy's cheeks flushed a little, a little embarrassed. "Yes, well, I enjoy it."

Sirius looked at him skeptically.

Lupin obviously felt the need to defend himself. "Just because I don't run around the castle pulling pranks like you and James doesn't mean I don't have fun."

"Sure," Sirius said, grinning at how flustered he'd become. "But of course, prefects can't play pranks."

"We can if we don't get caught," Lupin muttered under his breath.

"What?" Sirius asked, curiosity piqued.

Lupin looked at him, startled. He hadn't expected Sirius to hear him. "Nothing," he said quickly.

"No, no, Remus," Sirius said with a wild grin. Never in a million years would he have expected the prefect to be a closet prankster. "I heard you. What pranks have you played?"

Lupin ducked his head, looking extremely uncomfortable. Sirius saw this as a chance to not only find out about the pranks, but to also get Lupin to start trusting him. He leaned closer so their forearms were touching. "You can tell me," he said softly. "I can keep a secret."

Lupin looked up, obviously hesitant. Sirius gave him a version of his innocent, 'of course it wasn't me professor' looks. Finally the boy relented. "Remember when McGonagall transformed to her cat form and wasn't her normal tabby color?" he asked in a whisper.

"That was _you_?" Sirius hissed. McGonagall had not been pleased when she transformed in front of their class and instead of her usual orange fur she had become a brilliant neon green cat. Everyone had suspected Sirius and James but there had been absolutely no proof.

Lupin nodded.

Sirius looked at the small sandy haired boy with newfound respect. "That was bloody brilliant!"

Lupin smiled, blushing and ducking his head again, unused to praise. "We should probably quit for the day," he said, closing his book. "It's time for dinner."

Sirius nodded, standing. "James'll want to meet you."

Lupin gave him an odd look. "We've lived together for five years. We've met."

"He's met Remus Lupin. He hasn't met the mastermind behind the only memorable prank that he and I didn't commit," Sirius told him. "He told me he wanted to know who did it so he could shake the fellow's hand."

* * *

James and Peter were already eating when Sirius and Lupin arrived. They exchanged grins when they saw them enter together, finding the whole situation amusing. 

James as well as a few others were surprised, however, when they saw Sirius leading Loony Lupin over to where he and Peter were sitting.

"He sure is moving fast," James muttered.

"He only has a month," Peter reminded him.

James nodded, running a hand through his hair (actually mussing it up rather than smoothing it down), with a sigh. He noticed that Lupin looked rather uncomfortable as Sirius grabbed his arm and led him towards them.

"Here," Sirius said, gesturing at the empty seat across from James. "Sit."

Lupin looked unsure, but Sirius gently pushed him down into the seat. Sirius sat next to him, across from Peter. "James, Peter, you know Remus?"

Both boys shot Sirius a look similar to the one Lupin had given him earlier.

"Sirius," James said, with the air of talking to a five year old. "We've lived with him for five years. Of course we know him."

Peter snickered and Lupin gave a timid smile.

Sirius grinned, ivory teeth gleaming. "You think you know Remus. But you don't_know_ Remus."

James watched as the little smile faded from Lupin's face. "Sirius," the boy said softly. "Do we have to talk about this here?" He glanced pointedly at the head table.

James was intrigued. "What?" he asked, looking between Sirius and Lupin.

Sirius had taken Lupin's hint though. Now he was busy writing whatever he had to say in a note, which seemed to make Lupin no more comfortable than he was before. The note was handed to James, who shared it with Peter. The note then self-combusted, much to Lupin's relief.

Everyone in the Great Hall, especially the teachers, may have thought it odd when James Potter leaned across the table and vigorously shook the hand of someone he'd lived with for five years as though he was just meeting him.


	2. Chapter 2

Remus glanced up from the book that was balanced on his crossed legs before quickly returning his gaze back to the page. He had been reading the same sentence for nearly half an hour – since Sirius had draped himself across the bottom of his bed, reading a comic book.

The dark haired boy was confusing Remus. He had been certain the tutoring was a set up for some elaborate prank, but three days had gone by and there had been nothing. And now, after three days they apparently had reached a comfort level where Sirius had no qualms about laying on his bed and reading.

Except Remus wasn't comfortable. He couldn't shake the feeling that there was something malevolent behind all of this. But, as he occasionally chanced a glance at the boy sprawled along his bed, he could only see a roommate reading. No harm in that.

James entered the dorm, eyes scanning the room before coming to rest on Sirius. Remus could have sworn there was a flash of a scowl on his face before he gave them a smile.

Remus sighed mentally as the messy haired boy walked over to them and flopped onto his bed as well, making the mattress bounce and Remus lose his place on the page. Not that it mattered since he'd been at the same place for thirty bloody minutes.

"What are you reading?" he asked, looking first at Sirius, then turning to include Remus in the question. Sirius lifted the comic, showing James the title then going back to it without a word.

Remus was openly watching them now, instead of the small furtive glances of earlier. He didn't understand this familiarity. A few days, and they were acting as if they'd always been friends. It made him nervous.

It wasn't that he didn't want friends – assuming that this whole thing really wasn't some prank – but getting close to people only meant that they looked more closely at what you did. That was something he didn't want or need and would only lead to trouble.

"Earth to Remus," James said, snapping him from his thoughts.

Remus blinked, looking at him in confusion.

"Where'd you go there, mate?" James asked. "You spaced out."

Remus noticed that Sirius had finally stopped reading and curious blue eyes were fixed on him, waiting for an answer. "I was just contemplating the theory of magic as a finite property," he lied smoothly. Hopefully that would deter any further conversation as it didn't seem to be any topic that either of them would be interested in.

"Ugh," James said. "How can you think about stuff like that outside of class?"

Remus shrugged, hair falling in his eyes as he bent back over his book and pretended to be thoroughly engrossed. He blinked when the book was pulled from his lap and replaced by Sirius' comic. Looking up, he found himself face to face with a grinning Sirius.

"Why don't you try some light reading for once, Remus," he said. "You'll fry your brain if you keep reading this stuff and then I'll fail DADA without a tutor." He then opened Remus' book and flopped down next to him, frowning at the words in disdain.

Remus was so busy trying to figure out what to do about this new development that he missed James' eyes rolling behind his glasses.

* * *

James' original plan had been to be as cold and aloof to Lupin as possible. If the boy felt uncomfortable around him he would stay away from him, and therefore stay away from Sirius too. 

He had no intention of making this bet easy for Sirius to win. Twenty gallons was no laughing matter.

It seemed however, that Lupin was so shy that he would stay away anyway – even if James did nothing. And the boy was so quiet and unassuming and bloody _brilliant_ – James still couldn't get over the fact that he was behind the McGonagall prank – that he found it difficult to be mean to him. In fact, twice that week he'd ended up asking Lupin his opinion on a prank and the boy had not only helped him, he'd made it so it would be virtually impossible to trace it back to them.

Even Peter had grown quickly accustomed to having him around. He had taken to asking Lupin for help with his homework. James and Sirius were more than competent in all their subjects, but neither of them had the patience Lupin did. Where as James would eventually get frustrated and tell Peter to bugger off, and Sirius would tell him to bugger off before he even asked for help, Lupin didn't seem to mind.

Sirius, for his part, was doing the best he could to get closer to him. He took every opportunity to be with him, from just reading on his bed to sitting next to him in the Great Hall. Sirius also found that Loony Lupin wasn't really loony at all – in fact the boy was quite interesting, and despite being quiet he was still able to carry on animated conversations, even about things not related to school.

The first time Sirius managed to make Remus laugh was forever etched in his brain. They were in the Great Hall and he'd said something teasing James, who was once again making a prat of himself in an attempt to impress Lily. He couldn't help but be surprised when Remus had laughed, rather than giving him his usual timid smile. Sirius couldn't recall a time in the five years he'd lived with the other boy that he could remember hearing him laugh. It was quiet, just like everything about him, but there was something so genuine in the sound that Sirius found himself trying to make it happen again.

Over the next week the boy seemed to gradually relax around not only him, but James and Peter as well. The constant tension they'd felt from him dissipated and he appeared to be getting used to the new arrangement where they actually spoke to him instead of ignoring him. He had somehow easily managed to turn their tutoring sessions into simply talking to each other instead, though he had to admit he was surprised Lupin let him get so distracted when he was supposed to be teaching him.

He grinned as he headed back to Gryffindor tower. His charm was obviously working on the boy. This bet was in the bag. His grin abruptly fell as he turned a corner, seeing _him_. He was leaning against the wall with that _arrogance_ – the kind that had been practiced and passed through the Black family for generations. Sirius would have walked right by him, but the git actually addressed him, surprising him into an abrupt stop.

"Where you off to then?" Regulus asked, lips twitching as if they wanted to curl into a sneer.

Sirius didn't hide his own sneer. "I don't see how that's any of your business," he said to his brother.

"Going to see the mudblood?" Regulus asked, his face the perfect picture of Black pretentiousness. It amazed Sirius how similar they looked and how completely different they were. "Mother and Father will be so pleased to hear about that."

"What?" Sirius said, just barely holding back a snarl. "What are you on about?" He hated this. It was bad enough dealing with his family when he was home – ever since Regulus had come to Hogwarts they'd had their little spy to keep them constantly informed about his every action.

"Your new friend," Regulus said, no longer hiding his sneer. "Severus was telling me about him. A mudblood. Pathetically poor as well. At least Potter is a pure blood, despite his family's—" his nose crinkled, "—less than admirable views."

Sirius' fists clenched and only incredible self-control kept him from decking his brother right there. "First off, Lupin isn't my friend." He didn't need this getting back to his parents – though he hardly knew why he cared. "Second off, what the hell would Snivellous know about anything?"

Regulus grinned, an action that was less to show mirth and more to bare teeth. "You'd be surprised what Severus knows about _him_."

A frown made it's way to Sirius' face. "What does that mean?"

Regulus shrugged, pushing himself from the wall and starting to walk away. "I'm sure you'll hear from mother soon."

"Can't wait," Sirius growled after him, then turned and stalked away, continuing to his destination, mood quite destroyed.

That stupid, arrogant, pompous, obnoxious, slimy, worthless, rotten, vile—

Just before Sirius could bark the password at the Fat Lady, the portrait slid open and Lupin stepped out. He looked at Sirius in surprise, immediately frowning at the sour expression on his face. "Is everything all right?" he asked, concerned.

If possible, Sirius' scowl became even darker. This was all Lupin's fault. That wasn't fair and Sirius knew it, but it was still what he was thinking. If it weren't for that small quiet boy who hadn't asked Sirius and James to make a bet about him, Sirius wouldn't be facing the probability of another of his mother's letters. A letter where he would be informed of what a disgrace he was to the family and reminded of how, if it weren't for Regulus, she would have no son with a future. "Just fine," Sirius responded, though the tightening of his voice said otherwise.

Remus had never seen Sirius looking so unhappy and it bothered him. "Are you sure?" he asked, wondering if maybe there was something he could do to help.

"Isn't that what I said?" Sirius snapped. "Keep your nose out of it."

Remus blinked then his gaze fell to the floor. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean – I guess I'll see you later." He walked around Sirius, heading down the hall.

Sirius immediately felt bad as he watched him leave. He'd obviously hurt him. It then occurred to him that he was letting a bad mood ruin all the progress he'd been making with the boy. "Remus, I'm sorry," he said quickly. The boy turned, looking at him questioningly. "I didn't mean to be such a prat. Just – bad mood."

Remus studied him for a moment, then offered him a little smile. "It's all right." He hesitated before saying, "I was going for a walk…it might make you feel better…?" He didn't know why he felt so nervous inviting Sirius along – he was just too unused to this friend thing. He still didn't know if that's what Sirius and James and Peter wanted from him. No other immediate reason for their behavior was presenting itself, though. At this point if it was a setup it was the most elaborate prank ever – it would also be rather cruel.

Sirius really just wanted to go up to the dorm and hex his pillow a few times, but he forced himself to give the boy a grin and say, "Why not?" If his parents were eventually going to disown him, he was going to need the 20 galleons from James.

They walked in silence for quite some time, Sirius not in a very chatty mood, and Remus afraid to say something that might make him angry again. They made it out to the grounds before Sirius finally said, "You have any siblings?"

Remus blinked, surprised at being addressed. "No," he answered. "I'm an only child." His parents had enough to deal with without having to worry about endangering a baby who would have a werewolf for a brother.

"Well, you're not missing out on anything, believe me," Sirius said crossly.

Unsure what exactly to say, Remus went with, "I didn't know you had any siblings here."

Sirius snorted. "Yeah, my younger brother. Little Slytherin snot."

Remus was beginning to see why Sirius might be upset. Slytherin's had an uncanny ability to get under your skin – it seemed to be a prerequisite for the house. "It doesn't sound like the two of you get along," he commented, hoping Sirius wouldn't get upset at him.

Sirius was feeling angry again. "He's a wanker. He's always sneaking around looking for me to mess up so he can report it to our parents. Little shit." It was out of his mouth before he realized who he was talking to. He hadn't really meant to tell Lupin all of that. They had made it to the lake and Sirius flopped down onto the ground, uncaring if he was essentially putting an end to the other's boy's walk. It didn't seem to bother him though, for he sat down next to him.

"Maybe he's jealous of you?" Remus suggested, pulling his legs up to his chest and looking out over the lake, which was quiet save for a few ripples here and there.

Sirius had planned to change the subject, but the absurdity of the comment had him responding. "No way. He's the favorite son in the Black family." There was obvious bitterness in his tone. "He's got no reason to be jealous."

Remus laughed softly. "Maybe not at home," he said. "But what about at Hogwarts?"

Sirius stared at him, caught off guard both by the rare sound of Remus' laughter and what he said.

"You're _Sirius Black_. You're smart and popular and everyone knows who you are from Gryffindors to Slytherins to professors. I didn't even know you had a brother. Maybe he's just trying to make up for being overshadowed by you here by doing what he can to stay the favorite at home?" Remus didn't have any brothers, but he understood what it was like to wish for a life that different than his own.

Sirius had never looked at it that way. Regulus was an arrogant prick who'd grown far to similar to his parents for his liking. But perhaps Remus was right. Maybe there was another motive behind his actions besides pure malevolence? He'd like to think so – it hurt to watch his brother, who he had once been quite close with, falling down a path so dark.

He was quiet for a moment, until the rest of Remus' words hit him. "You think I'm smart and popular?" he said, waggling his eyebrows at the other boy.

Remus resisted the urge to roll his eyes. "I think that most people do," he said neutrally.

Sirius put on a pout, making big puppy dog eyes at Remus. "But you don't?"

Remus gave a small smile, then stood up. "I wouldn't have said it if I didn't think it," he said, a little shyly. He may not have spoken to Sirius more than a few times before last week, but the boy was so loud and so well known by everyone it was impossible not to see that he was quite popular.

Sirius grinned, standing as well and swinging an arm over a surprised Remus' shoulders. "I knew it," he said.

They made their way back to the castle, a comfortable silence falling between them. Sirius realized with some surprise that Remus had been correct, the walk had made him feel better. Or maybe it was just having someone to talk to. "Hey Remus," he said as they entered the common room. "Thanks." He meant it too.

* * *

It was in walking to dinner after a tutoring session that Sirius discovered why Lupin seemed to have given up on attempting to keep them on topic when they were studying. 

"Sirius," he said. "Why are you doing this?"

Sirius' stomach flipped. Had Remus somehow found out? "Doing what?" he asked, managing to look perfectly calm.

"Having me tutor you. It's obvious you already know what I'm teaching you."

"Oh," Sirius said, almost smiling at his intuitiveness. "Well…" he hesitated. Lupin waited patiently for his answer, light brown eyes gazing at him curiously. Sirius suddenly felt uncomfortable. Then James' voice popped into his head, reminding him that he had less than three weeks. Lupin didn't seem like the type to casually shag – which meant Sirius needed to build up a relationship as fast as he could. Now was his chance. He pretended to look embarrassed. "Well, I kind of…like you, Remus. I wasn't sure how to get close to you, so I thought if you tutored me we could be together a bit."

Lupin was quiet and Sirius feared that he was straight and he had probably scared him off – 20 galleons down the drain – until the sandy haired boy replied softly with a simple, "Oh."

So Lupin _was_ a poof. Sirius flashed him a smile. "Remus, I have to run to the common room. I'll see you at dinner."

Lupin nodded, looking at him in confusion. Sirius made a show out of hesitating then leaning in quickly and kissing him on the cheek before running off and leaving Lupin staring after him with a blush on his face. Sirius grinned. This was going to be easy.

* * *

Things at dinner were slightly awkward. Lupin was abnormally quiet, even for him, and Sirius kept glancing at him out of the corner of his eye. James' grinned, realizing Sirius must have made his move. Whether or not Lupin's silence was a good or bad thing, James didn't know. But he couldn't help but think it didn't look good for Sirius. His grin widened. 

"I have to go study," Lupin said, standing abruptly as soon as he had finished. "I'll see you later." James noticed that his eyes stayed resolutely away from Sirius.

Sirius watched him leave, a small frown on his face.

"So," James said to Sirius as soon as he was gone. "What happened?"

Peter was stuffing his face with mashed potatoes but they both knew he was listening as well.

Sirius took a bite of a biscuit. "I told him I liked him and I kissed his cheek," he said, munching away.

"And?" James said. "What did he say?"

"I left right after. Figured I'd give him some time to think about it. But he didn't seem grossed out by the idea. Guess he is a poof."

James shook his head. "Well mate, you've got less than three weeks to convince him to shag."

"Don't you think this is kind of mean?" Peter spoke up, swallowing his mashed potatoes.

Both black haired boys looked at him.

"Remus is nice," Peter said. "He helps us with our pranks and doesn't turn us in. And he helps me with my homework."

"Peter, you've never talked to Lupin before last week. Why are you acting like he's you're best friend?" Sirius asked.

"He's _nice_. You're taking advantage of that and you're going to really hurt his feelings, then he's going to hate us and not talk to us again," Peter said.

"It's all in good fun, Peter," James said, rolling his eyes and going back to eating.

Sirius wasn't all that hungry anymore.

* * *

Remus wasn't studying. He'd gone to the most secluded corner of the library with that intention, but the scene in the hallway kept replaying over and over in his mind and the words on the page were blurring until they looked like a picture of Sirius staring up at him. Frustrated, he closed his eyes, running a hand through sandy hair and rubbing the back of his neck. 

He liked him? Sirius Black, practically the most eligible man in Hogwarts, liked _him_?

Why?

And did Remus like Sirius? He didn't know. He liked spending time with him, he'd found. Sirius made him laugh, and he hadn't had a reason to do that in so long. He liked that.

And that Sirius had gone so far out of his way just to get an excuse to talk to him was sort of...sweet.

He shook his head as if to clear it. This was Sirius Bloody Black. It didn't make any sense. He was straight for one. Hell, Remus was too. He'd never thought about liking another boy. He'd always fancied girls, even if he'd never acted on it because of...

Then there was that, wasn't there?

Even if Sirius really did like him, and even if Remus wasn't straight and maybe liked him back, it wouldn't matter. What kind of relationship could anyone have with a werewolf? And who would want one in the first place?

As if in answer to his question hands suddenly rested on his shoulders. He tensed as a silky voice whispered in his ear, "What are you reading?"

Remus sighed. "I'm studying for transfiguration," he said. "If you don't mind." He tried to shrug the hands off.

Instead they gave his shoulders a squeeze, then slowly started sliding forward, palms flat against his chest. Remus remained very still, even though the touches made his skin crawl. "I thought I made my feelings on this quite clear, Severus," he said calmly.

The hands paused, then continued on their journey – one sliding lower over his stomach, the other moving towards the opening of his robes. "Part of me thinks you're playing hard to get."

Remus' hands flew up, wrapping around Snape's wrists and stopping the wandering hands. "Surely you're intelligent enough to realize that isn't the case."

There was a frustrated growl as Snape wrenched his wrists from Remus' loose grip. The Slytherin moved around the chair, glowering at the boy. "And why is that, Lupin?" he spat. "You're too good for a Slytherin? The Gryffindor prefect can't lower himself to my level?"

"It had nothing to do with that, Severus, and you know that," Remus said, perfectly calm. He unfortunately was growing well used to these sneak attacks, which had been occurring more and more often since the first time Remus had turned Snape down in fourth year. "I don't have feelings for you. I don't know how many times I can tell you that. No matter how many times you sneak up on me and try and grope me, I still wont."

Every time Remus turned him down, Snape seemed to only get angrier and more determined. He was coming to expect the verbal lashings, but when the Slytherin snarled, reaching out and grabbing Remus _hard_ by the wrists, he let out a tiny surprised squeak. Eyes widening, Remus tried to pull his hands away, hissing when Snape's fingers tightened further.

"You've never even given me a chance," Snape growled. "You think you're a better person because you're a Gryffindor? Because you're a prefect?"

Snape didn't know what it was about the sandy haired Gryffindor that drew him. Maybe it was the quiet way he carried himself, unlike most of his obnoxious housemates. Or that loneliness that Snape saw in him – the same he felt in himself. Or perhaps it was just the boy's innocence, some purity that he wanted to taint. Whatever it was, Snape wanted him.

"You're hurting me," Remus said, beginning to panic a little. He couldn't get to his wand like this.

Snape felt satisfaction run through him as the infuriating calmness with which the Gryffindor always regarded him slipped, and Remus desperately tried again to pull his wrists free.

Snape only held on tighter, surprising Remus further as he suddenly stood astride him, nearly sitting in his lap. He lowered his face until he was inches from Remus' – dark eyes boring into brown ones.

Remus sucked in a breath at the closeness.

"You could at least give me a chance," he said again.

Remus' eyes widened and he tried to pull his head back as Snape moved forward, capturing his lips in a surprisingly gentle kiss. Remus whimpered at the unwanted contact as well as the pain in his wrists, where Snape's grip had tightened so hard that it brought tears to his eyes.

And then Snape was standing, letting go of him with something akin to disgust. "Think what you want, Lupin, but you're no better than anyone else."

Remus glared up at him, gingerly rubbing his wrists, which were already beginning to bruise. "Then why do you keep after me?" he sneered in a nasty tone that was completely unusual for the normally calm and quiet boy. He was angry and he was feeling threatened and wolf instincts were taking over, hackles rising.

Before he could blink he was staring down the end of Snape's wand. It shook slightly, his anger more than obvious. Remus stayed absolutely still, well aware he'd never reach his wand before Snape hexed him.

"Don't push me, Lupin," Snape growled, an ugly twisted expression on his face. "My patience isn't infinite."

Remus wanted to say that he wasn't asking for Snape's patience. In fact he wanted nothing from the boy except to be left alone. But he remained silent. They stared at one another for several moments before Snape turned and stalked away.

* * *

"Sirius?" Lupin's soft voice said in the common room later that night. James and Peter had gone to bed and the common room was slowly emptying out. Sirius looked up at Lupin from the couch and smiled. "Hey, Remus." 

"Can I sit down?" Lupin asked, gesturing at the couch.

Sirius nodded and moved over to make room for him. They both sat and stared at the fire for a while, Sirius glancing at him occasionally. Maybe he had been wrong when he thought Lupin was a poof – he'd been acting strange since dinner. In fact, he looked even more tense and nervous than usual, and Sirius hadn't thought that was possible.

"I'm sorry I acted so weird," Lupin said eventually. "You just – took me by surprise."

"I didn't mean to," Sirius said, amazed at how efficient he was at lying like this. "I just wanted you to know."

The last of the Gryffindors headed up to bed and the two boys were left alone.

Lupin smiled. "I just wasn't sure how to react. No one's ever said anything like that to me, and – well, you've never really talked to me before last week. Part of me wondered if it wasn't some joke." His light brown eyes searched Sirius' face as though looking for confirmation that it wasn't a cruel prank.

"Remus," Sirius said, taking hold of the other boy's hand and ignoring the guilty squirm of his stomach. "I wasn't kidding, I really do like you." Having no experience trying to get blokes to like him he decided to treat this as he might if he were talking to a girl. He lifted Lupin's hand and kissed it gently. In the glow of the fire Sirius could see a blush crawl up Lupin's face.

Sirius was too busy wondering how far he could push this to notice the bruise that surrounded the other boy's wrist. He leaned towards Lupin until he could feel the smaller boy's breath on his face. They stared at one another for a moment, Lupin looking ready to pull away but never quite doing it, and Sirius finally moved closer and captured his lips with his own.

Sirius hadn't known what to expect – he'd never kissed another bloke before. He was surprised to find that it didn't feel as weird as he thought it would. It actually didn't feel weird at all. It was tentative, but it was the sweetest kiss Sirius had ever experienced – and he had experienced quite a few. It wasn't passionate or bruising, just soft and gentle. One of Remus' hands slid its way up to tangle itself in Sirius' hair as Sirius ran his tongue along Remus' lips, silently requesting permission to explore deeper. Remus complied and Sirius slowly deepened the kiss, placing his hands on the smaller boy's face.

There was a noise from the stairs that led to their dormitory and they broke apart hastily, breathless. They watched as Peter emerged at the bottom of the stairs wearing snug fitting pajamas that were too long for him.

"Hey Sirius," he said when he saw them on the couch. "Remus."

"Hello, Peter," Remus said, smiling kindly and standing rather abruptly from the couch.

"I left a book down here. Sorry if I disturbed you," Peter said, looking specifically at Sirius.

"Couldn't it have waited until morning?" Sirius half growled.

"It's okay," Remus said and Sirius frowned at his expression. He looked… relieved? "I was going to bed anyway. "Goodnight, Peter. Night, Sirius."

"Goodnight, Remus," Peter answered. As soon as the sandy haired boy disappeared up the stairs Peter and Sirius were glaring at one another.

"Thanks a lot, Pete," Sirius hissed, irritated. "I was making serious progress there." He was trying to convince himself that that was the only reason he was angry and pretend he hadn't felt a rush of disappointment when Remus had pulled away.

"Yes, I saw, Sirius. That's why I interrupted."

"Why you—" Sirius jumped up.

"Sirius, this is wrong," Peter said, with more bravado than Sirius had ever seen the chubby boy display. "This isn't some one night stand. You're messing with his emotions and you're going to really hurt him."

"I know what I'm doing, Peter," Sirius snapped, brushing past him. But as he headed up to the dorm he couldn't help but wonder if maybe he had no idea.

* * *

Sirius hadn't seen Remus all day. They had different classes and Remus wasn't at lunch. He walked into the dorm and found him sitting stretched out on his bed, leaning against the headboard, reading. He looked up when Sirius entered, but didn't return the smile he sent him. 

Sirius' smile faltered. "You missed lunch," he said.

"I wasn't hungry," Remus stated flatly.

"Is everything okay?" he asked, moving over and taking a seat next to him on his bed. Remus continued looking at his book, but Sirius could see his eyes weren't moving. "Remus?"

"Everything's fine," Remus said quietly. He sighed. "Look, Sirius, I think I may have given you the wrong impression last night." Remus still didn't know what he had been thinking when he let Sirius kiss him. He had been upset about his encounter with Snape and Sirius had been so nice and gentle…he had to stop this before it went any further. "I had just wanted to tell you that you and I wouldn't be a good idea."

"What?" Sirius exclaimed. "That sure didn't seem to be what you were saying with that kiss."

Remus returned his gaze to his book. "I'm sorry. I mislead you."

"Remus, I don't understand. Did I do something to upset you?"

"No." Remus hesitated. "It just wouldn't work."

"Why?" Sirius asked, feeling a little desperate. "Is it me? I can change."

Remus looked at him, brown eyes filled with...sadness? "It's not you that would need to change, it's - circumstances."

"Circumstances?" Sirius said.

"I'm sorry, Sirius."

Realizing that words weren't going to be of use here Sirius shifted on the bed closer to Remus. He kneeled up grabbed his face and kissed him, straddling him so he didn't have anywhere to go. The other boy stiffened in surprise. This was too reminiscent of what Snape had done. Except Sirius wasn't hurting him.

Sirius coaxed Remus' mouth open with his tongue and he felt the smaller boy's body tense before relaxing, melting into the kiss as their tongues battled. He dropped his book and his arms wrapped around Sirius' neck almost without his conscious consent.

This kiss was just as electrifying as the night before, but it was also different, full of a passion that surprised Sirius and a desperation that seemed to stem from both of them.

When they broke apart, Sirius looked down at him, blue eyes clouded with something that Remus couldn't quite describe. "Please give me a chance," he said softly.

Remus turned away. "I'm not good enough for you," he said.

It was Sirius' turn to look away, the guilty feeling settling into his stomach once more. "You're ten times better than me, Remus."

"You don't know that. You hardly know anything about me."

"But I want to. Won't you let me?" Sirius asked, watching him intently.

Remus sighed. He wanted to let him. No matter how much he said he fancied girls he knew without a doubt that he wanted Sirius to kiss him again. He also knew that despite everything in him that said this was a bad idea, he found he didn't care anymore. "Just keep in mind you may not like everything you find out," he finally said, giving in.

Sirius' lips broke into a grin. "I don't think it's possible for me not to like anything about you." He kissed him again, then grudgingly got up. "Are you coming to dinner?"

Remus smiled, but at the same time was wondering what on earth he'd gotten himself into. "I'll meet you. Give me ten minutes to finish this chapter - I've been reading the same page all afternoon." Sirius seemed to have that effect on him.

Sirius laughed, leaning over to kiss him once more, trying to understand why he couldn't seem to get enough of the sensation. "I'll see you in the Great Hall."

Remus nodded and went back to his book.

Exiting the dorm he nearly ran into James and Peter, who had been standing outside, obviously eavesdropping. Peter was scowling.

Sirius glared at them as he closed the door and headed down the stairs. When they were in the common room, James spoke. "Nice save, mate. Lupin almost cost you 20 galleons."

"Like I could be dismissed that easily," Sirius said with a wave of his hand. He was relieved, but also a little disturbed, because, looking back on it, the galleons hadn't really been foremost in his mind when he had reacted.


	3. Chapter 3

"No."

"Oh, come on Evans," James said.

Sirius, Peter, and Remus were sitting by the fire, all three managing to listen attentively to the conversation taking place across the common room without actually looking like they were. Sirius and Peter were pretending to be thoroughly involved in a game of chess, and Remus' nose was, as usual, buried in a book. Sirius had positioned himself on the couch next to Remus, using the boy's legs as a footrest. Peter occasionally tossed him a glare when Remus wasn't looking, but Sirius resolutely ignored him.

It had been a few days since Sirius had convinced Remus to give it a try, and though they hadn't gone any further than snogging when people weren't around, Sirius was pleased with how things were progressing. Getting the boy comfortable and into a relationship was half the battle after all.

"I said no, Potter," the red head James was accosting said.

James persisted. "When you say no I know you really mean—"

"Never?" Lily said.

Sirius and Peter exchanged winces as James spoke his next words. The only indication that Remus heard was the slight raise of an eyebrow. "Other girls would kill to be in your shoes." Wherefore art thou, Romeo?

"Kill themselves is more likely," the girl retorted, before turning and stalking up to the girls dormitory, well aware that James couldn't follow.

Sirius coughed, trying to cover the laugh that threatened to break free and Peter bit his lip before sending his knight to take the other boy's bishop. Even Remus' lips twitched slightly. James stormed over, and fortunately all three of them managed to get straight faces on before he made it to them.

"That girl sends out such mixed signals," he said, sounding thoroughly exasperated as he flopped into the armchair near Remus' end of the couch.

"Didn't sound mixed to me, mate," Sirius said, sending his rook to battle one of Peter's bishops. "The only signal I was picking up was loathing."

"Do shut up," James snapped. He sighed and suddenly looked totally dejected. "I don't know what she wants from me."

Two weeks ago Remus wouldn't have even thought about speaking up in this conversation. Of course, two weeks ago he'd probably have been in the library by himself as well. "Perhaps if you stopped calling her Evans, she'd be more receptive to your advances?" he said, turning a page.

James glowered at him. "What would _you_ know about it?"

Remus glanced up from his book, trying not to look hurt. It had only been a suggestion. He didn't think James would be so defensive.

"Sod off James," Sirius said, glaring at him. "Don't take it out on Remus just because Evan's denied you again."

Remus' eyes widened as James turned on Sirius, looking ready to say something quite nasty. He hadn't meant to cause a fight, for Merlin's sake. Whatever James had been about to say was cut off as Peter piped up.

"Besides, James," he said. "If you were ever going to take advice from anyone, wouldn't Remus be a good one? They are prefects together – they probably talk all the time."

James closed his mouth, suddenly looking rather sheepish.

Peter was exactly right. Remus had heard plenty on the subject of James Potter and his 'insensitive and chauvinistic attitude.' He was the one she usually came to when she wanted a male's opinion on the matter. The advice he'd just given James was something he knew for a fact bothered Lily.

"Sorry, mate," James said to Remus, sounding contrite. "I shouldn't have jumped down your throat like that."

"Not to worry," Remus said as if nothing had happened. Sirius was watching him as he returned his attention to his book.

"Do you really think that would work?" James asked softly.

Remus looked up, studying him for a moment. He then gave him a small smile. "It would definitely help your cause," he said in a tone that made him sound quite certain of the fact.

James' eyes widened behind his glasses at that certainty, then he beamed at him. "Thanks, Remus!" he said. "You're a great guy."

Remus blushed, ducking his head and going back to his book. Only Peter saw the soft smile that graced Sirius' features as he watched him.

* * *

The change was barely noticeable, but to someone who spent most of his time watching – more specifically watching a certain Gryffindor prefect – it was quite obvious. The little looks, the slight "accidental" touches as they sat together at meals. Sirius Black and Remus Lupin were together. 

The thought left a bitter taste in Severus' mouth. He had been trying for over a year with no success to get Remus to look his way and Black waltzed into the picture and stole him away in less than two weeks. He watched as Black whispered something into Remus' ear and the tawny haired boy quietly laughed – actually _laughed_ - at whatever the idiot had to say. It made him sick.

Severus, of course, had seen this coming. He'd noticed Black's sudden interest in Remus when it had started, though the boy's intentions were unclear at the time. But even if Black had just woken up after five years and decided he wanted to be Remus' friend, Severus was not willing to let that happen. It had been simple to get alone with Remus before – the boy was always alone. But if he joined Potter and Black the boy would never be by himself again.

He'd thought he had taken care of the problem when he had casually pointed the new friendship out to Regulus, but obviously, for all his boasts and claims, the younger Black had no more control over his brother than anyone else did.

Severus stood, leaving breakfast early and heading, not towards his own class, but to find a place to wait and intercept Black. He was well aware that Black would be walking to Care of Magical Creatures alone. Remus and Potter had opted out of the class as soon as they could, and Pettigrew always waited until the last possible moment to stop stuffing his face, which meant the Black always made the walk across the grounds without any merry little band to back him up.

His hand was on his wand – not because he wanted to duel, but because Black had always been an act first, think never type of git and he didn't want to be caught off guard.

When Black eventually rounded the corner he stopped short, hand immediately moving to his wand.

"Black," Severus said.

"Are you lost, Snivellous?" the Gryffindor sneered. "Might want to get indoors before the sunlight causes you to burst into flames."

"Your wit never ceases to amaze me," Severus replied sardonically. "You've been making new friends I see."

Black's expression became a dark scowl that was quite unbecoming on his normally handsome face. "Why is it the entire Slytherin house seems so bloody concerned with what I do?" he asked.

"Stay away from him," Severus said. He wanted Remus. He wasn't going to let Black come in and take him.

"I'll go near whoever I please," Black snapped. "And I'd advise you to keep your beak out of it, since it's none of your bloody business."

"How did your parents take the news you were a ponce then?" Severus asked with a smirk.

Black's cocky grin disappeared almost instantly, much to Severus' satisfaction. Then it was back again, though slightly forced. "I know you want me Snivelly - everyone does - but I'm afraid I don't date people greasier than my breakfast."

"Has he told you?" Severus asked, deliberately looking smug.

Black looked confused. "Told me what?"

"He hasn't then. A lot of trust there." He snorted. "And you don't even care enough to notice. What is he to you? Some sort of conquest? Planning to move on as soon as you get him into bed?"

The look on the other boy's face made Severus think that he'd hit pretty close to the mark.

"And what the hell do you know, Snivelly?" he finally said.

"I know more than you'd think, Black."

Black's expression faltered again and he appeared to be out of 'witty comebacks.'

"Stay away from Lupin, Black. He's not yours," Severus said. The unspoken 'He's mine' hung clearly in the air.

Like he'd hit a switch Black had suddenly pulled out his wand, pointing it directly at Severus' face. "Keep your huge nose in your cauldron, Snivellous. That's the safest place for it. Otherwise who knows what might happen to it?" He muttered a spell and Severus' hands flew to his nose, which had begun growing. His nostrils were already the size of dinner plates by the time Black turned and stalked away.

* * *

Sirius quickly made his way down the hall, hoping Remus hadn't gone to his Arithmancy class early. Part of him knew he should probably have gone to Care of Magical Creatures and given himself a chance to cool off. 

But the encounter of Snape had not only left him angry, but the words Regulus had said to him weeks before kept running through his head.

_You'd be surprised what Severus knows about **him**._

He pushed his way through the crowds of students on their way to class and caught sight of a familiar head of tawny hair. Shoving past the rest of the people he made his way over to him. "Remus."

The boy jumped, startled. "Sirius? Don't you have Care of Magical Creatures with Peter?"

Sirius ignored the question. "I need to talk to you."

Remus frowned in confusion. "I have class in a few min—"

He didn't get to finish, for Sirius grabbed his arm and pulled him from the now thinning crowd and into an empty corridor.

"Ow, Sirius," Remus said, trying to pull away. "Let go."

Realizing his grip was much harder than he'd intended, Sirius immediately released him. Remus was watching him expectantly, wondering what on earth had gotten into him.

"Did you shag Snape?" Sirius blurted. He was no good at beating around the bush anyway.

"What?" Remus exclaimed. "Of course not."

"Then why did he say—" Sirius trailed off. Snape hadn't really said anything of the sort had he?

Remus' gaze, however, darkened. "He said we had shagged?"

"Not exactly."

Remus sighed, leaning back against the wall. "I can't believe him."

Sirius was confused now, and he hated the feeling. Why had he gotten so worked up about it anyway? So what if he had shagged Snape? Who the hell cared? It didn't matter to him one way or another.

"Wait," Sirius finally said. "How did he even know about us? Did you tell him?"

"That's definitely not a conversation I want to have ever," Remus said. "Snape has a—" He paused, considering. Crush didn't seem like the right word. "Fixation on me. I'm sure he figured it out on his own.

"Fixation?" Sirius repeated, not like the sound of that.

"He fancies me, I suppose. He's been asking me out regularly since fourth year."

"What?" Sirius hissed, suddenly feeling angry again at the mere thought of Snape trying to be with Remus. "Slimy Slytherin git. Probably just wants to get into your pants—" He cut himself off abruptly, feeling a little ill. Was Sirius any better, really?

If Remus noticed the sudden silence, he said nothing of it, instead absently rubbing his wrists. "Yes, well maybe now he'll get the picture."

"Picture?" Sirius asked, pulled from his thoughts by Remus' voice.

"That I don't fancy him."

Sirius grinned, pushing the churning in his stomach away to be dealt with at another time. He moved forward, and placed his hands on the wall on either side of Remus' head. "That's cause you fancy _me_."

Remus raised an eyebrow, looking unaffected, but there was a mischievous gleam in his eyes that few rarely saw. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Oh I think you do," Sirius said, leaning closer to capture his lips in a kiss.

But Remus ducked and slid under his arms, freeing himself from being pinned against the wall. "I'm already late for class," he said, sending an impish grin at him.

"So what's a few extra minutes?" Sirius said, advancing on him.

"Exactly that. A few extra minutes." Remus suddenly closed the distance between them, leaned up and gave Sirius a quick kiss before darting away from his grasp and heading to class. "See you at lunch."

* * *

"Remus Lupin you're a bloody genius!" 

Remus glanced up from his book in utter surprise as James came bursting into the dorms, grinning madly and stumbling his way over to his bed, followed by a puffing wide-eyed Peter. When he actually got a good look at James Remus' eyes widened as well and he leaned back into Sirius, discreetly trying to back away from the bespectacled boy.

"James," Sirius drawled from where he was sitting behind Remus, reading over his shoulder with his arms wrapped around his waist – okay so he hadn't been really reading so much as admiring the smooth line of Remus' neck. "Are you aware your face has sprouted…" he trailed off, apparently searching for the right word.

"Tentacles?" Remus supplied, head cocked thoughtfully.

"Mmm. Don't tentacles have suckers though?" Sirius asked.

"Not necessarily."

"No, I'm fairly certain suckers are an integral part of a tentacle."

"I don't think that suckers are a requirement for tentacle status," Remus said, eyes glinting with a hidden grin. "And if they aren't tentacles what would you call them?"

"Disgusting," Sirius responded.

Peter watched the banter in some amazement, momentarily forgetting that his friend did indeed have tentacles of some sort growing from his face. Almost always silent Remus Lupin was _bantering_, with Sirius Black. And damn if the two of them didn't look cute together.

"Can we please forget about classifying my growths and focus on the more important issue at hand, please?" James piped up.

"Which would be?" Sirius asked.

"Removing said growths?" Remus said.

"No," James said, quite exasperated with the two of them. "The fact that Lily Evans called me James!"

"Way to go, Jamie!" Sirius said, happy for his friend. His expression suddenly became a little disturbed. "Merlin's balls, now they're moving."

Remus leaned further into Sirius as a tentacle made a swipe at him. "That's really excellent, James. Now that you have given us that wonderful news, may I inquire as to how you wound up with tentacles growing out of your face?"

"He got so excited that she called him James instead of Potter that he tried to kiss her," Peter explained.

"Well, that'd do it," Sirius said, not sounding surprised in the least.

"So, Remus, do you have any more advice?" James took a seat on his bed.

As one, Remus and Sirius backed up as the tentacles reached out to say hello. "Avoid trying to kiss red heads with short tempers and—" Remus paused, leaning closer for a moment to examine one of the growths, and when he continued he sounded thoroughly impressed. "_Amazing_ jinxes. Look at that, there's actually a barnacle on that one."

"No way, really?" Sirius asked, leaning closer as well. "Blimey she's good."

James ignored them. "Advice? Hello? What you said worked, Rem, what else should I do?"

"Oy!" Sirius suddenly exclaimed. "You should get your bloody tentacle out of my boyfriend's pants to start!"

Remus had gone very still as one of the things growing from James' face began to crawl up his pant leg. But he and Peter and James (and James' tentacles) all positively froze at Sirius' outburst. Because, while they were all aware that Sirius and Remus were a 'something,' (though that 'something' was looked at differently by three of the four boys) Sirius had never called Remus his boyfriend before.

Sirius, realizing what he'd said, pretended to be nonchalant about the entire thing, even though he inwardly had begun to panic a little bit. He continued to glare at James, who finally snapped out of it and stood, taking his tentacles out of reach. "I'm going to go get these taken care of, I think," he finally said.

Peter eyed Sirius once before opting to follow James out of the dorm with a quick "See you later," to Remus and Sirius.

Sirius then mentally tensed, waiting for Remus to bring up what he'd said. But Remus simply picked up his book and snuggled up against him, content and not planning to question anything.

* * *

Sirius trailed feather-light kisses along Remus' jaw, moving steadily lower until he made it to his neck. The smaller boy leaned his head back to give him better access and he began alternately sucking and nipping gently at the skin there, reveling in the little noises Remus made. 

It had been almost two weeks since they had started whatever this was, and Sirius was still trying to convince himself that the reason he couldn't keep his hands off the other boy was simply because he was running out of time. It had nothing to do with the soft feel of his lips or those cute little whimpers that came out of his mouth or the fact that there was something absolutely stunning about the boy when he was lying under him, flushed and panting.

Sirius' hand began to wander, sliding between them and to Remus' robes only to be met with Remus' hand and slowly moved away.

Something in the part of his brain that wasn't concentrating on Remus' neck or feel of his hand threaded through his hair or the scent of his shampoo - which was really quite enticing - realized that he had just been denied. With less than a week left for the bet, this wasn't a good sign.

He needed to step up his game.

His teeth grazed across sensitive skin and he added a little roll of his hips, providing a bit of friction that nearly made himself gasp in surprise at the feeling.

Remus did gasp, hand clenching momentarily in Sirius' hair, and the dark haired boy's hand began to wander again, moving back to Remus' robes.

"Sirius, not yet," Remus said breathlessly, his hand once again catching his and moving it away.

Sirius made sure not to look frustrated, and he also made sure his mind was well aware that the _only_ reason he was frustrated was because of the bet. He flashed the boy a grin, not ready to push it quite yet. "Sorry," he said. "I got carried away."

He pressed his lips to Remus' then rolled off the boy, heading to the bathroom.

When the door was closed and he was alone he leaned against the sink, staring into the mirror. His face was flushed and his hair was mussed. This was becoming routine for him. Get Remus somewhere secluded, have an amazing snog and then go somewhere and feel guilty and disgusted with himself. This was wrong. Sirius wasn't a poof. It wasn't natural to kiss other blokes. And it certainly wasn't natural to enjoy it. He fancied girls.

As soon as this bet was over Sirius was going to go find a bird and shag her senseless.

* * *

A/N: I'm not dead. Neither is the story. I am really tired, though, and unable to form any more coherent thoughts. My excuse for lateness is writer's block. Forgive me. I love you. Thanks.


	4. Chapter 4

James Potter never got worried. He never felt guilty, concerned himself with others' feelings, or really thought much about the consequences of his actions.

Which was probably why he felt a little queasy now, three days before the bet was over, since every single one of those things that he never felt or did were suddenly and persistently first and foremost in his mind.

"All right there, James?" Peter asked, apparently catching the slightly green look on his friend's face – which fortunately, after almost a week of not being able to get rid of them, had nothing to do with tentacles.

"Mooning after Lily-kins again?" Sirius asked, cracking open one eye to peer at him, but closing it again rather quickly with a happy, "Mmm."

"I'm fine," James said.

They were in the common room by the fire, the only people still up this late, even though it was the weekend. Peter and James had taken up residence in the two armchairs on either side of the couch. Remus was sitting on one end of the couch, and Sirius' long body was stretched across it looking quite comfortable with his head resting in Remus' lap. Remus had been reading a book, absently running fingers through Sirius' thick dark hair, though now he had set the book down and was leaning against the back of the couch, looking very much like he was sleeping, save for the slow rhythmic movements of his fingers. He'd seemed exhausted as of late, and James wondered not for the first time if he was getting ill. Even so he looked content, if not downright happy as he sat there.

This was what was making James feel so incredibly terrible. Worse than he'd ever felt before. Because he knew that look on Remus' tired face was due to the boy in his lap, who, he had to admit looked just as pleased and content as Remus himself. But he also knew what Sirius' motives were – being as he'd been the one to give them to him. It recently occurred to him, somewhere between getting advice from Remus about Lily and having the prefect deliberately ignore the fact that he hexed Malfoy right in front of him, just how right Peter had been. They were complete and total arses.

Remus was a decent bloke. No, more than that, Remus was - nice, funny, brilliant – why hadn't they befriended him before? Yes he was shy and quiet (though not as much once they had gotten him comfortable enough to start talking) but he was also good and kind and much better than any of them, except maybe Peter, who, while lacking a backbone, at least could see right from wrong.

"I think," Remus said, startling James. "I'm going to go to bed." He'd finally opened his eyes and there was a weariness in them that none of them had seen before.

Sirius, apparently noticing this as well, sat up, looking at him in concern. "Are you getting sick?"

Remus smiled at him. "Just tired," he responded. He stood with a little less ease than usual and made his way towards the dorm, book in hand. "Goodnight," he said, before disappearing up the stairs.

They watched him go, all three of them slightly worried that he was sicker than he was letting on.

Finally Peter said, "I'm gonna go to bed too." Not long ago he wouldn't have dreamed of going to bed before his two friends, afraid he'd miss something. But if Remus could, then he certainly could. Besides, he was still angry with Sirius and anxious over what would happen in three days time. Even if Sirius didn't win, then he would dump Remus flat at the end of the month. And if he did win, he'd still dump him flat. He was also a little annoyed with James, who hadn't bothered to say anything to Sirius about this, even after everything Remus had helped him with.

He stood and left, not bothering to say goodnight as he went.

James and Sirius sat in silence for a while, both apparently lost in their own thoughts. Eventually though, Sirius spoke. "Something's wrong with Re – Lupin."

James heard the stumble. "Has he told you what?"

Sirius shook his head. "Anytime I ask him he brushes it off."

"Well, if he won't tell you he's not going to tell us."

Sirius looked at him then, actually confused at the statement, before it dawned on him what James was saying. Sirius was, for all intents and purposes, Remus' boyfriend. If Remus were going to tell anyone, it would be him.

"I'm sure it's nothing serious," James assured him.

Sirius tore his eyes away from him, glancing back to the fire. Remus was so shy and secretive – Sirius was actually extremely worried. He could be deathly ill and Sirius didn't think he'd own up to it unless he keeled over.

He shrugged. "Whatever, not like it matters. As long as he's got enough energy to shag." Sirius was aware of how little time was left. He was also aware that he sounded like a complete and total prat.

"Oh sod off it, Black," James snapped, sick of Sirius pretending like he didn't care about Remus at all.

Sirius looked at him in surprise.

"Don't act like you couldn't give two shites about what happens to him, because I know you do. We all do," James said, finally admitting that he looked at Remus as a friend now. And friends didn't do things like this to each other. "This… this is going to hurt him. No matter which one of us wins, in the end it's him who loses."

Sirius stood abruptly, as if the couch had burnt him. "Not you too, James. First I have to hear this bleeding heart bullocks from Peter, and now you too. You, of all people, knew exactly what you were getting into when this started. You made the bet Potter, don't forget that. It's not my fault you got attached. The minute the bet's over so are he and I."

Sirius was tired of feeling guilty all the time. He couldn't stand it. Turning on his heel he left James sitting alone in the common room as he stalked up to bed.

* * *

"So how did you, one of the Noble Black, wind up in Gryffindor?" Remus asked as they walked through Hogsmeade. It was Remus' first trip there, never having bothered before. He hadn't planned on going today either, wanting to just relax in his bed. The full moon was two days away and the closer it got the less he slept. But Sirius had pestered him until he finally gave in – his patented puppy eyes crumbling his resolve. 

Sirius, James, and Peter had drug him all over the town showing him everything that was worth seeing. His pockets were now full of sweets from Honeydukes that Sirius and Peter had bought for him when he'd said he wasn't going to buy any for himself, and a few novelty items from Zonko's that James swore Remus couldn't live without.

Remus felt a little bad that they were buying him things, but truth be told he just didn't have the money to spend on himself. Most of his parents' income went to trying to find a cure for him – something he'd given up on long before they would. As a result, spending money was few and far between and he tried not to use it frivolously.

He couldn't help but smile though, warmed by their generosity, despite the cool crisp weather.

When James had spotted Lily in the Three Broomsticks and drug Peter in with him, since Lily liked the small boy much more that she liked Sirius, Sirius took advantage of the distraction and tugged Remus away so they could spend some time alone.

They walked in a companionable silence up a deserted path that led a little away from town, until Remus broke the quiet with his question.

"Well I always was a bit of a rebel," Sirius responded with a smirk. "Being placed in Gryffindor was the ultimate rebellion."

Remus laughed softly. "I guess so. How did your parents react?"

Sirius' brow furrowed. "Well, I've basically been disowned, only going home for the summer where my parents lock me in my room and the only contact I have is with a miserable house elf named Kreacher." He blinked, feeling an embarrassed flush work its way up his neck. Why on earth had he told Remus that?

Remus was looking at him now, expression unreadable. Finally he shyly reached out and took Sirius' hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze.

They kept walking hand in hand.

"What about you?" Sirius asked, wanting to change the subject. "Was getting into a Gryffindor a surprise?" With the way Remus studied and read he sometimes seemed more like a Ravenclaw to Sirius.

Remus actually snorted. "Getting into the school was more of a surprise."

"Why?" Sirius asked, curiosity piqued at that response.

"Um," Remus began, wide-eyed as if he'd made a fatal mistake. "My family thought – I might have been a squib." He looked away.

"You?" Sirius asked with a laugh. "You're amazing with magic."

Remus suddenly paled, breath hitching in his throat as he stopped in his tracks. Sirius thought for a moment it was something he'd said, but he followed the boy's gaze and saw what had caused the reaction. He grinned. "Afraid of the Shrieking Shack?" he asked. "They say its haunted by violent spirits."

"Let's go back," Remus said, eyes still fixed on the Shack.

"Don't tell me you believe that bullocks," Sirius said, taking a step forward and tugging lightly on Remus' hand with a grin. "Come on, I won't let the ghosties get you."

Remus refused to budge however.

"Rem, you don't have to be afraid," Sirius persisted. "It's just an old building." He gave Remus' hand a gentle squeeze, then tugged at him again.

Remus' eyes finally moved from the Shack and looked at him, a little panicked and full of real fear. That building was the scene of so many nightmares – it stood for pain. Just looking at it brought flashes of things he was happier not remembering.

Sirius immediately stopped insisting at the look on Remus' face. "What's wrong?" he asked, truly concerned. He'd never seen Remus look quite like that.

"I…just want to go back. Please." Remus' voice was soft, pleading.

Sirius nodded and turned without another word about the Shack. "Come on," he said, never loosening his grip on Remus' hand, but tugging him now in the opposite direction. He glanced over at Remus every now and then on their walk back, but the boy seemed to have closed down completely, his expression blank.

Sirius found that he couldn't stand to see him like that. So when they were well out of sight of the Shrieking Shack, but not too close to town, he stopped, turning the boy towards him and kissing him. He kept his eyes open to see Remus' reaction.

The smaller boy blinked in surprise, thankfully coming out of whatever trance he'd been in, and slowly kissed him back. Remus eventually relaxed into Sirius' arms, and the kiss went on for some time before they finally broke for air.

"Sorry," Remus said, glancing away and looking a bit embarrassed. "I didn't mean to—"

"It's okay," Sirius said, running fingers through his tawny hair before reaching for his hand once more. "Let's go find Peter and Jamie. Hopefully there won't be any more embarrassing things growing from him after his latest encounter with Evans."

Remus smiled, letting himself be led away from the Shack and towards… well, towards his friends.

* * *

Sirius' words from two nights before kept running through James' mind. Tonight was Sirius' last night before his month was up. 

James knew, no matter what happened, Remus was going to wind up hurt. But at least he could maybe lessen that a little. If Sirius slept with him and then dumped him – James could only imagine what that would feel like.

That was why James was sitting on his bed, waiting for Sirius in their dorm room.

When his friend eventually entered and closed the door James jumped right in. "Sirius, I can't let you do this."

Sirius started, not realizing he was there. "What are you prattling on about, James?" he said, despite the fact he knew very well.

"The bet. Don't go through with it. Peter was right, this is… it's just cruel, Sirius. We were cruel to make it in the first place."

"You shouldn't have gotten attached, James," he snapped, his voice rising.

"Sirius, this isn't about the sodding bet anymore. It doesn't matter. He's falling for you. I can see that, Peter can see that. You make him happy. He never looked happy before, you know that!" James' voice had risen as well.

Sirius knew that! He knew how awful this was. But if he ended the bet, if he told Remus now – how could the other boy even look at him if Sirius told him the truth?

It occurred to him then, the realization both thrilling and frightening, that he _wanted_ to shag Remus. He wanted to be that close and that intimate with someone – someone that he… cared about.

Bloody hell he cared about Remus Lupin. Very much.

If he ended the bet though, how could he ever be with him? What would people think if he couldn't just write it off as something he was doing for entertainment and twenty galleons?

All of these thoughts made him panic. Which in turn made him angry, because Sirius had never once felt this unsure and out of control in his entire life.

Suddenly the voice of his brother and Snape entered his mind.

"_Going to see the mudblood? Mother and Father will be so pleased to hear about that."_

"_How did your parents take the news you were a ponce then?"_

He wasn't a poof! He couldn't afford to be one. People would talk.

"I don't care!" he said in response to James, wishing it didn't hurt so much to say it. "It's a simple bet. Just because he's stupid enough to believe the shite I've been feeding him doesn't mean I'm just going to give up twenty galleons!" It was about the money. That was it.

"Sirius, you can't tell me you don't at least like him as a friend."

"No. I don't." Lie. "I can't stand him." Lie. "I hate spending time with him, he's boring, weird, annoying—" Good, sweet, kind, loving. He shook his head to clear those thoughts.

James sighed. "Look Sirius, I forfeit. You can have the twenty galleons. Please, just break it off gently with him and let's forget it ever happened."

"No," Sirius growled. He couldn't. Not now. "I don't take money unless I earn it. Loony Lupin will be sufficiently shagged before tonight is over."

He stormed to the door before James could say anything else, wrenching it open, only to feel as if the floor had fallen out from under him.

Remus was standing outside the door, clutching a book to his chest as if it was the only thing that still made any sense. Which in a way, it probably was. His head was hung, bangs hiding his eyes from view.

"Remus—" Sirius choked out.

"You don't have to call me that," Remus said midly. He didn't look up. "Loony Lupin… is fine."

After a moment his eyes rose to meet Sirius. He looked so betrayed, so hurt, that Sirius felt as if the emotions Remus was feeling were actually smothering him. He couldn't breathe. And worst of all, there was disappointment there, but not in Sirius. It was as if Remus was disappointed with himself.

"_No one's ever said anything like that to me, and – well, you've never really talked to me before last week. Part of me wondered if it wasn't some joke."_

"Remus," Sirius said again, taking a step towards him.

Remus bolted, down the stairs and out the portrait hole.

James appeared behind Sirius, staring down the staircase sadly. He hadn't wanted Remus to find out like that. Honestly he'd been hoping the boy wouldn't find out at all. All the cruel things Sirius had said came back to him and he angrily looked toward his friend. "Want to give me my twenty galleons now or later you bloody wanker?" he snapped, pushing his way past Sirius, who hadn't moved, and making his way down the steps.

* * *

Remus didn't know where he was running; he just didn't stop. He wanted to cry, but couldn't find any tears. He knew it. He'd known it was too good to be true. Not only Sirius, but James and Peter as well. The whole thing had been a lie. A joke. A bet. And somewhere deep down he'd _known_. 

That didn't stop the burning in his eyes and throat, or the ache in his chest that he knew wasn't from sprinting through the castle.

Eventually he stopped, leaning against the wall and panting for breath. After a few minutes he took in his surroundings, realizing with a groan that he was in the dungeons.

"Well if it isn't Remus Lupin," a smooth, all too familiar voice issued from the shadows.

Remus pulled out his wand quickly. "What do you want, Severus?"

"Just wondering what you're doing down in my neck of the woods," Snape answered silkily, stepping closer. His greasy black hair hung around his face and he was grinning – an action so un-Snape-like it made Remus nervous.

"I'm not in the mood for you, Snape," he said.

"What's wrong, Lupin? Black shag you and dump you? I could have told you he would. No matter what house they're in, Blacks only do things for themselves."

Remus didn't answer, though a brief expression of hurt flittered across his face, giving himself away.

"So it was Black," Snape said, sounding amused. "He give you up for Potter?"

"Shut up, Snape!" Remus said, raising his wand to hex him. Snape was quicker though.

"Expelliarmus!"

Remus' wand was ripped from his grip and he was thrown backwards with the force of the spell, hitting the wall behind him. He slid down it dazedly, having cracked his head quite hard.

Snape walked up to Remus, squatting next to him. Grabbing his chin, he forced the Gryffindor to look at him. "I don't know why you won't let me love you," he said softly, gently running his thumb along Remus' cheekbone.

"Because I don't love you, Severus," Remus murmured. His eyes were a bit glassy, and his vision darkened a little as unconsciousness threatened him.

"And you love that good for nothing Black?" Snape snapped, continuing his menstruations with his fingers, ghosting them down Remus' neck and along his collarbone.

Remus didn't answer, and for a moment it looked as if he'd passed out, but his hand came up and batted Snape's away. "Stop it, Severus."

"Does Black know about your little secret, Lupin?" Snape said.

Remus tensed, looking up at him with eyes that were a bit more alert.

"I know it," Snape continued. "I figured it out. How do you think Black would respond to such information?" His hand ran through Remus' hair. "I know it and I still love you. We're both dark creatures, you see. But Black, could he ever love a monster like you?"

"It doesn't matter anyway," Remus said, once again trying to push Snape's hand away. "He couldn't even love a person like me. Forget the monster." There was a pause as Remus blinked slowly. "How did you find out?"

Perhaps it was his semi-conscious state, but he was taking the news that Snape knew he was a werewolf surprisingly well.

"Watched the lunar chart," Snape said, his wandering hands pulling open the top of Remus' robes. Sliding them off of Remus' shoulder his fingers lightly ran over the many scars that covered the Gryffindor's body. He kissed the largest scar on Remus' shoulder, the fateful one that he'd received when he was only six. "Watched how you acted around silver." He kissed another scar. "It wasn't difficult. I'm surprised Black and Potter never figured it out. They are supposed to be the best and brightest, and they live with you. They never noticed your monthly disappearances? It shows you how wrapped up in themselves they are."

Snape took that moment to kiss Remus, who opened his mouth in protest only to have him shove his tongue in it. What really woke Remus up was that this wasn't Sirius. And that thought brought back everything that had happened before he'd stumbled into the dungeons. As his head cleared slightly he pushed hard at him, breaking the kiss and knocking the Slytherin on his arse. "Get off me, Snape."

He tried to stand but found he was too dizzy. Snape crawled back over to him, grabbing his face in his hands and kissing him again – a hard, bruising kiss that made Remus whimper. He struggled, but Snape had straddled him, pinning him in place.

"Stupefy!"

Snape was suddenly flung off of Remus with the force of the spell and landed next to him, unconscious.

Remus stared at his unmoving form for a while before slowly looking in the direction that the spell had come from. Sirius stood, holding his wand tightly, his face pale against his black locks. They stared at one another for a long moment before Sirius spoke.

"Are you okay?"

Remus nodded, looking away.

"Merlin, Remus," Sirius said breathlessly. Remus looked up to see Sirius staring at the patchwork of scars that marred his shoulder. Remus quickly pulled his robes closed, holding them tightly together.

There was a pause. "Are those – did you do those? As the werewolf?"

Remus' head shot up. Sirius was watching him, an indecipherable expression on his face. With a moan he pulled his knees up to his chest and let his head drop down to hide in them. "How long were you there?" Sirius heard Remus' muffled voice say.

"Long enough," Sirius replied.

Remus sat still for a moment, then slowly stood on shaky legs, using the wall for support. Sirius made a move as if to help him, but then thought better of it. His head was throbbing painfully after being slammed into the wall, and he could hear his pulse pounding in his ears.

"Well, if you'll excuse me," Remus said, drawing himself up with as much dignity as he could muster. He walked over and picked up his wand, then moved to walk by Sirius, wondering if perhaps he could go drown himself in the prefect's bathroom before Moaning Myrtle found him.

"Remus," Sirius said, grabbing his arm as he tried to walk past. "Please… don't go. Those things I said to James," he could feel Remus tense in his grip, "I didn't mean them."

Wrenching his arm from Sirius' grip, Remus turned to face him, glaring. "Listen Black," he spat. Sirius flinched. Remus had never called him that, not even before they'd begun talking. "I will not sleep with you. Just give up and pay James the twenty galleons. Stop trying to use me."

"Remus, that wasn't what I was doing—"

"Then what were you doing? Do you have another bet on now? Ten galleons if you can get me to listen to you?" The tears he couldn't find earlier were suddenly welling up in his eyes, and he turned away, disgusted with his own weakness. "Twenty five if I kiss you?"

Sirius swallowed around the lump that had suddenly formed in his throat. He had hurt Remus so badly; it made him ill to think about. He moved without thinking, turning the boy around and pulling him closer, planting a desperate kiss on his lips.

After recovering from the surprise, Remus shoved him away. "Don't touch me."

The lump in Sirius' throat got bigger, and if Remus noticed the shine in his eyes it wasn't enough to change his mind. He turned and walked away without another word. Sirius made no attempt to stop him.


	5. Chapter 5

Remus was a werewolf.

Sweet, gentle, kind, loving, Remus Lupin turned into a vicious blood thirsty beast every sodding month.

_Just keep in mind you might not like everything you find out._

The boy's words had been running through Sirius' mind ever since he'd learned the secret. And Merlin did he feel stupid. Snape was right. What kind of daft idiot could have missed something that important? They _lived_ with him for Merlin's sake!

It was simply a reminder of how easily Sirius had ignored his very existence. How had he lived like that anyway? In one short month Remus had managed to take such a hold over him that Sirius felt like not having him by his side, talking to him, laughing with him, snogging him senseless, was going to be the death of him.

It hurt. And what hurt more was that it was entirely his own fault – as both James and Peter had angrily pointed out. They'd warned him this would happen, and they had been right.

He spent much of his free time that day in the library, reading every book he could find on werewolves. By the fourth time he found the quote _"…is extremely dangerous and should be killed as soon as it becomes infected…" _he was getting both irritated and frustrated. The fact that every single book stressed the fact that werewolves were absolutely _not _human, no matter how they much they looked that way, also served to put him in a foul mood, until he wound up slamming one of the books so hard that Madame Pince came over to chastise him.

Remus _was _human. He was sure of it. Once a month he wasn't, that Sirius couldn't deny, but there was no way the shy quiet boy wasn't human on every other day. Something inhuman couldn't have his heart broken, and Sirius had oh so foolishly proved that Remus could.

He picked up one more book and began flipping through it, surprised to realize that this was the first one that wasn't simply about how to identify, escape, and kill them. This one talked about the actual transformations. Sirius paled when it explained how painful it was to transform, as they could apparently feel every shifting bone break, every muscle tear, every joint pop.

It occurred to him how terrifying that must be – changing with no control, feeling the pain and knowing that in moments you would essentially lose your mind, your humanity.

The more he read the angrier he became. This book detailed the prejudice werewolves faced, the legislation the Ministry set against them – ridiculous laws that forbid them certain jobs, forced them to be registered with the Ministry, and forbid them from breeding.

Who the fuck did they think they were that they had the right to tell someone that it was illegal for them to have a child?

When he got to the chapter on werewolf hunters and started reading about skinning he shut the book, closing his eyes and feeling quite sick.

How had Remus lived like that? How had he dealt with all of that looming over his head by himself? And how had he managed to smile in that soft carefree way of his?

It was when Sirius realized that he would probably never get to see that smile again, especially not directed at himself, that he truly began to realize just what it was he had done.

* * *

Remus had spent day waiting for Snape and Sirius to tell the school his secret. There was so much pain and worry in his heart that he had become almost numb. He was barely able to care that he would be expelled, because then at least he could be away from Snape. From James and Peter. From Sirius. The combination of it all made him feel as if he were suffocating—drowning.

When the day passed without any frightened stares or attacks on his person he found himself confused. He had expected the entire school to know by lunch and to be expelled and on his way home by dinner. Not that that could _really _happen - not with the full moon tonight. Dumbledore would certainly let him transform, then ship him off the next morning.

Remus looked around the Great Hall in amazement as everyone went about their normal business, blissfully unaware that a werewolf was in their midst. He sat alone at the end of the Gryffindor table, as far away from James, Peter, and Sirius as he could get.

As he ate Remus could feel someone's gaze on him. Looking up, his eyes locked with Snape, who sat across the Great Hall watching him unblinkingly. There was an odd malicious expression on his face and Remus wondered if he was planning to seek revenge for being left unconscious in the dungeons the night before. Eventually Snape looked away, turning his gaze to Lucius Malfoy, a Slytherin seventh year who had just demanded the attention of the entire table.

Remus returned to poking at his food, having no real appetite at all. The feeling of being watched, however, didn't dissipate, and he glanced around, not overly surprised to see Sirius was also staring at him. The raven haired boy quickly averted his eyes when Remus met his gaze, and Remus felt his heart constrict painfully just from looking at him.

He sighed. The two people who knew his greatest secret were the two people that he couldn't trust.

* * *

"Where have you been all day?" James asked Sirius at dinner. Aside from classes he hadn't seen his friend at all. Sirius actually looked a bit ill and he'd barely touched his food. James also noticed that his gaze kept wandering down the table to where Remus sat, eating by himself. Could it be that Sirius Black actually felt guilty about what had happened?

He and Peter had had no intention of even speaking to Sirius after what had happened, but it was hard not to when he had come back to the dorm the previous night looking like a kicked puppy.

"Library," Sirius said. James waited for some sort of elaboration, but got none.

Well fine, if Sirius didn't want to tell him, James wasn't going to ask.

"What were you doing at the library?"

Thank Merlin for Peter.

"Just had some things I wanted to check out," Sirius replied vaguely. James and Peter exchanged bewildered glances.

Out of the corner of his eye James saw Remus stand and head out of the Great Hall. The boy didn't look well at all. He had bags under his eyes and James had to wonder if he'd gotten any sleep at all the night before. He hadn't returned to the dorm by the time he had gone to bed.

Sirius watched him as he went by, and if Remus noticed he made no indication of it. His eyes remained trained on the ground and he walked past them all without even glancing at them.

Peter was staring down at his food before he surprised both James and Sirius by standing up and walking quickly after him.

"Remus," he said, and the other boy turned, looking both surprised and confused. "I wanted to apologize…" Peter trailed off, suddenly feeling like his words were completely insignificant. With a deep breath he continued. "I didn't have anything to do with it…but I… I should have told you." Excellent, now he was stuttering.

Remus stared at him for a long moment and Peter shifted uncomfortably, feeling like the boy was looking right through him. Then his eyes were abruptly off of him, and fixed instead on the enchanted ceiling. The sun was just starting its descent towards the horizon, and the sky was a brilliant shade of orange that would have been serene if it weren't for the fact that Peter was anxiously waiting for something, anything, to come out of Remus' mouth.

"I have to go," was what he said. With that he turned and continued out of the Great Hall at a quick pace, as if he couldn't get away fast enough.

With a sigh, Peter walked back over to James and Sirius. James looked disappointed, while Sirius was staring up at the ceiling as Remus had been, an odd intensity in his eyes. "I have to go check something," he said suddenly, standing.

He was halfway out of the hall before James even had a chance to get out, "Sirius, what…"

* * *

Early the next morning Remus tiredly made his way back to Gryffindor Tower from the hospital wing.

The wolf had been worse than usual this month and Remus wondered if it had something to do with his own whirling emotions. He wished he hadn't had to run out on Peter, but not only did he have to get to the Shack, he also had absolutely no idea what he could possibly say to the boy.

Madame Pomfrey had managed to heal the smaller cuts, but unfortunately she could do nothing for the deep gash on his abdomen. Werewolf wounds, even self inflicted, were difficult to heal with magic. Thick bandages were hidden under his robes and he walked slowly to keep from jarring the wound. Madame Pomfrey also hadn't been able to hide the bruises that had most likely been caused by the wolf slamming himself into the door. There was a bluish one forming by his temple and a very large black one along his shoulder, which he had dislocated and was still painfully sore.

The castle was empty; everyone was still in bed. At least that's what Remus had thought until a voice from behind him told him otherwise.

"Lupin, you look like you just got in a fight with a wolf."

Remus turned quickly, breath hitching as the bandages pulled at his wound painfully.

Snape continued. "But I suppose, in some sense, you did." He was smirking, and the predatory gleam in his eyes made Remus feel a little nauseous.

"What do you want, Snape?" Remus asked, not revealing any of the trepidation he was feeling. It was almost impossible to go for his wand between the gash on his abdomen and the fact that he could barely move his right shoulder without wanting to pass out.

"To continue where I left off before we were interrupted the other night." He took a step towards Remus, who promptly backed away.

"I thought I made it clear I wasn't interested."

Snape raised a dark eyebrow. "Who said I cared if you were interested?" He was done playing around.

Remus was looking for a way to escape, but Snape was backing him closer to the wall, and he knew he'd have no chance of outrunning him like this.

"Besides," Snape continued. "If I were you I'd be _very _interested."

Despite the situation, Remus snorted. "Think that highly of yourself?"

Snape glared. "What happens if the whole school finds out what you are?"

What little color that Remus had drained away completely.

"Parents wouldn't want their children in school with a werewolf. I guess you'd be expelled? That would certainly be a shame. So you see," Snape said, stepping close enough that Remus could feel his breath on his face. "You may want to rethink your feelings."

Remus said nothing as Snape leaned towards him, making no attempt to get away. People couldn't know, he couldn't let them know. He still had two more years to go. He closed his eyes, feeling a wave of hopelessness overtake him as Snape's lips met his.

It came as quite a surprise when the kiss was abruptly ended and he opened his eyes to see Snape on the ground, clutching a bloody nose. Sirius stood in front of him, glaring down at the Slytherin with his fingers still balled into a shaking fist.

"If you touch him again, Snivellous, I will break every finger on your dirty groping hands," he growled.

Snape pushed himself to his feet, trying to look dignified, which was rather difficult to do with blood dripping between his fingers. "Lupin was perfectly willing."

Sirius' eyes flashed dangerously. "And if you try and blackmail him again I _will_ kill you." His tone was so deadly serious that it had both Snape and Remus wide eyed.

The Slytherin glared between them, finally turning and stalking off without another word.

When he was gone Sirius turned, and he and Remus stared at one another for a moment.

Finally he spoke. "Did Snape do that?" he asked Remus, gesturing towards the bruise on his temple.

Remus shook his head, regretting it as he did as that made it start to ache. "Memento of the wolf," he said quietly. Sirius didn't seem to know what to say to that, and they stared at one another a little while longer before Remus let out a sigh. "What are you doing here, Sirius?"

"I wanted to talk to you," Sirius said, suddenly looking nervous.

"There's nothing to say," Remus said, beginning to walk up the hallway. His nerves, combined with the exhaustion from the past couple of days and his recent injuries, didn't let him get very far. Sirius had just finished saying, "Yes there is," when Remus' knees buckled.

Sirius moved quickly and caught him under the shoulders, becoming even more concerned at Remus' hiss of pain. "Did I hurt you?" he asked, helping him stand. Remus swayed and the boy kept his arm around his waist to steady him.

"My shoulder," was all Remus said, tilting his head towards his right shoulder.

Sirius nodded and draped Remus' left arm over his shoulders, helping him into a nearby classroom. He gently sat him in a chair then pulled another one over to sit across from him. Their knees touched as he leaned forward and said, "Let me see."

Remus was too tired to argue as Sirius gently pushed the top of his robes aside. The dark haired boy cringed as he revealed a large dark bruise that spanned from Remus' shoulder blade to his arm. It was then he noticed the bandages. Blood was already starting to show through the thick white pads.

"Why did Pomfrey let you out of the hospital wing like that?" he asked, shocked at the mediwhich.

"Because I hate it there," Remus responded simply. She had absolutely no defenses against his pleading eyes and she always let him go, despite her better judgment.

It occurred to Sirius that Remus probably spent a good deal of time in the hospital wing. "Is it always this bad?"

"No." He looked at Sirius, oddly expressionless. "Apparently the wolf was upset this month."

Sirius sighed, closing his eyes and lowering his head. "I know you don't want to hear how sorry I am, and I know that it doesn't change a thing, but… I've never regretted anything as much as I regret what I did to you. I just… the more I got to know you, Remus… I was confused. I didn't mean to…" he trailed off, totally at a loss. Remus wouldn't even look at him.

"And this," Sirius said, running his fingers gently over the bruise so as not to hurt him. "This is my fault."

Remus shuddered and closed his eyes as Sirius' fingertips grazed his skin. He tensed when he felt Sirius softly kiss his shoulder.

"Is it your turn to blackmail me?" he whispered. "Still have a chance to win the bet?"

Sirius drew back as if Remus had slapped him. "I would _never_ do that."

Remus said nothing.

"You don't believe me?"

"How can I?" Remus asked, sitting up and yanking his robes closed. "Everything you've ever said to me was a lie."

"That's just it!" Sirius exclaimed, startling him. "Nothing I told you was a lie. No matter how much I tried to convince myself otherwise. Everything I said to James was me lying to myself, Remus. I kept that stupid bet going to be near you – so I could hug you and kiss you. I knew if I told you you'd leave me."

"You couldn't just be with me to be with me," Remus said.

"That's not true," Sirius protested.

"Then why," Remus said calmly, his emotions impeccably controlled from years of practice hiding what he was feeling, "did you need to keep the bet going? You needed an excuse, Sirius. A reason. Because why would ladies man Sirius Black suddenly be with some strange scrawny bloke with no friends?" A question Remus should have asked himself a little more insistently before getting so involved. "That way if anyone questioned it, you could let them in on the secret and everyone could get a good laugh out of it." An eyebrow rose. "Am I right?"

Sirius swallowed. His mouth had become dry. Remus had hit it directly on the head. He'd been so afraid of what everyone else would think. "I don't care anymore," he said hoarsely. "I don't care what anyone thinks. I need you, Remus. I'm a terrible person. Only a terrible person would make a bet like that. But… you make me want to be a better person."

"Merlin, Sirius," Remus said, closing his eyes. "I'm only – well, no I'm not even human – I can't save you, or make you a better person or whatever it is you think I can do. Don't look at me like I have some saving grace, or like I'm some ideal to be upheld. I'm not here to be your guardian angel."

Sirius bit his lip. He'd never heard something so cynical or hopeless come out of Remus' mouth. "Remus, you are human. I know you are," he said, and his tone left no room for argument. "Once a month you're a little furrier. So what?" He hesitated before continuing. "It's not about what you can do for me… I want to make you happy. I want to protect you, keep you safe. I want to comfort you when you're sad or hurt. I want to see you smile."

Remus gaped at him, at a loss. Finally, when his voice came back to him he whispered, "Don't say that."

"Why not?" Sirius demanded.

"Just don't." There was something in Remus, something that couldn't let himself believe those words. Not only because they were coming from Sirius, who had lied to him and betrayed his trust.

Sirius knew what he was. How could anyone feel that way about him with that knowledge?

"Remus," Sirius said softly, leaning towards him.

Remus knew, if he let him, Sirius was going to kiss him. And, damn him, Remus almost wanted to let him. The words Sirius had spoken to James suddenly popped into his mind, repeating over and over like a skipping record and he pulled away, not meeting Sirius' eyes. "I can't."

"Remus—"

"No, Sirius. Just looking at you hurts."

Sirius actually thought that he could feel his heart shatter. He glanced away. "I understand. Remus… James and Peter… they tried to get me to stop, they didn't want to hurt you. You don't have to pull away from them just because of me. They're fond of you." He didn't say we because it would cloud the issue at this point. "Let us stay your friends? If not me than them?"

Remus sighed. "I don't know. I need time to think." It had all happened so fast. He had heard James' side of the argument though, and he knew the other boy had been trying to protect him, even if he had been the one to make the bet in the first place.

"Mr. Black, Mr. Lupin," a stern voice said from the doorway. Professor McGonagall stood at the door, hands on her hips.

Sirius jumped and Remus looked at her, clearly startled. Both watched her with guilty expressions. Students weren't supposed to be wandering the halls this early, and they most definitely were not allowed to be in classrooms unsupervised.

"You two are six hours early for Transfiguration," she said, eyebrow raised in what _might _have been amusement. They stared at her. "Mr. Lupin, I heard you had taken ill during the night. You should really be resting in bed." She gave Remus a pointed look. "Mr. Black, please see that he gets there."

Then the usually strict witch ushered the two boys out of the room – at a slow speed for Remus' sake. Had they been less confused they might have caught the sympathetic look in her eyes, suggesting that perhaps she had heard some of the conversation.

Sirius did as McGonagall asked and made sure Remus made it to his bed, then he curled up in his own four poster, skipping Herbology and Muggle Studies (a class he'd taken for the sole purpose of pissing off his parents) for a few extra hours sleep. Once he had checked the lunar chart and realized that it was the full moon he had been up all night, listening to the howls that he could just make out if he strained.

When he eventually woke around midday, Remus was still sound asleep – not that Sirius could blame him. Turning into a werewolf and ripping yourself apart had to take a lot out of you.

Sirius didn't see James or Peter until dinner because of schedule differences. As they ate he told them everything that had happened, leaving out Remus' injuries and his lycanthropy. He promised himself he would never betray Remus' trust again, even though Remus hadn't exactly told him in the first place.

They were both shocked to hear about Snape, and each of them said they'd keep an eye out for him in case he tried to get Remus alone again. Even if the boy couldn't let himself be their friends again, they would watch his back. It was the least they could do.

They ate in silence after that, all of them looking up in surprise when Remus appeared, still looking quite ill, but at least a little more rested, and slowly took the empty seat next to Peter. He bit his lip, gaze on the table, before finally glancing up and giving them a small hesitant smile. His eyes didn't linger long on Sirius, however.

James beamed back and Peter grinned. Sirius felt a great wave of relief rush through him and couldn't help but marvel at how forgiving Remus was. Maybe, in time, he'd forgive Sirius too.


End file.
